Do you ever run conversations in your head to see how they sound? I'm sure we've all gone over the past and thought "I should have said ...... instead". I was thinking about a possible future conversation with my friend, who is a bit sick at the moment but said if she's better by the weekend then we can go to one of her friends place for a bbq and booze sesh. I've only met the person once, but I was surprised by myself at the conversation in my head..
The conversation stopped when I realized I said something along the lines of: "but I'm dying to be social, lets go somewhere where we can chat to others"

"I'm dying to be social"....SOCIAL?! What is wrong with me. I mean sure, I don't get anxious when I'm in big crowds at the shopping center anymore, and I no longer have that constant pull of wanting to go home. I chat and ask questions to people I meet on the beach, where as I use to not even look up when I walked past.

But this feeling of actually WANTING to meet people, to learn their stories, to go places and have new adventures, is completely foreign to me. It was something I did because I was I had to. The "I have to" feeling had gotten stronger due to my road trip - I didn't have a choice when I was traveling alone. The "I don't wanna do this" feeling had gotten weaker, because the possibility of lying in bed doing nothing and seeing no one wasn't an option.

You know what? I like it. This was exactly what I was hoping for by traveling. I'm still not exactly what you would call confident. But I'm defiantly on the right track.